It aint fair. I've... I've really tried. And I knew that he was down, and I tried to cheer him up, and that didn't work... so I tried to tell him it was okay to be down sometimes and that everyone sometimes are... but he took that as ignorance. As me waving him off.
I told him my plans were to sleep on my own but if he was sad, I wanted him to stay.
This he took as me wanting him to leave.
It never matters. It just never matters what I do.
Either I do it wrong, I don't do it at all, or I overdo it... I don't know. Just seems as though it's never right.
Never good enough.
It aint fair.
I tried.
Well, part of me's upset about it, but there's another part of me that doesn't feel anything. And it makes me sad. It's like that Sounds Like Violence song: "We used to tear eachother apart, it felt good I knew that I was alive, but now we have nothing. You could come on and make me feel something."
And right now I don't feel anything. I feel nothing.
And it makes me sad.
I dont know.. I really dont. You need to think, he needs to think... I hate to use the words 'time apart' but...
ReplyDeletehmm, you know youre just like me becca, you know we always care, wana give everything but the other one just gets us wrong and when we look back we, well i regret the way i said it, youre right its not fair, i cant give advice to you, the girl i like is ignoring me for some hell of a reason i dont know, this is life becca this is life :(
ReplyDeleteoh hope that guy realizes what idiot he is, (sorry :) its just not right )
ReplyDeleteI guess you're right about that :P
ReplyDeleteIt's just that I'm so sick of taking time, you know? that's what I've always done... I'm starting to get a little sick of the whole "wait and see" idea. Well, amin, put that way you're making it sound like I'm some sort of saint :D while I aint :D (rhyme on purpose!) It's just taking so much energy to make us grow, to care for what we got, and I can't help but question if it's supposed to be like that. If we gotta work this hard for it all the time.
I dunno, I just thought somehow it'd be easy once you got this far..
I'm sorry hon... :(
ReplyDeleteaaah no offence but i didnt realy say your are a saint, i just mean you sound (from several poems) that you give more than you expect :)
ReplyDeleteNone taken, amin, in fact you make me feel flattered. And I think you might be right about that too. We will see what happens now. I just know that I feel exhausted.
ReplyDeleteThanks for being so good to me =)