No wonder she never comes out. Jiggery-Pokery, I mean. Every time she tries there's always someone disapproving, someone minding, just cause they can't stand someone living stuff out, just cause they're too bitter to take some silly jokes coming. Why do people have to, like, mind all the time? Why can't we just laugh together and have a go at eachother, on an all friendly-like level, without thinking too much 'bout what we're saying or what we're doing? Seems impossible to find folks like that, folks that are okay with stuff, like. Now everyone's so posh, you can't have a good laugh, cause people just misinterpret you all the time, think you're being serious about things. Some folks don't understand her, but I love her, and people keeps dragging her down, keep weighing on her, so she loses so much of herself along the way. It's a shame, really.
I've finished the painting with the angels! Finally! I thought I'd bring it to work tomorrow so I can scan it and post. Don't have the blessing of a scanner in the house, which is a shame, cause it sure comes in handy. I'm gonna try and get my hands on one cheap, cause I'd really need a printer for when I get back to school, and the scanner part of it, well, that would just be for fun.
Nebula, it aches in me when I think of how soon it is that you'll be gone. I know that's your spirit, your whole being, that a soul like yours can't be trapped in a place like this... this forgotten and cold place at the far end of the world. And I know you won't be coming back, not here, even if you would come back to this country. This place is too small for you. And honestly, I wish I was like you. I'm always talking about how I wanna be free, how I'm going to fly, and be something. But when you do something to change what we're in, it scares me, and selfish as I am, I think more of what I am losing in this than of what you are gaining. Please give me a call someday, I really wish we could talk in private some time before you leave here. Talk like we always do.
People, you are all too good to me, but my mind flees. See you next when I've done a Rowling and I'm ridiculously wealthy and famous cause of my writing.
Tuesday, July 31
Monday, July 30
Multiple Personas
Why do you sometimes feel as though a hundred years of life have been crammed fit into your seemingly only nineteen-year old body? Anyone had this problem? Well, that's the best way I could describe it. Or honestly, it's like I'm going multiple personalities here. One minute I'm that hundred years old, wise like, bitter and sad this-is-all-good-for-nothing-anyway kind of person, let's call her the Battered Old Lady. Next minute I'm jumping up and down in excitement, laughing and joking, like some kid, let's call that one Jiggery-Pokery. Minute after that, I might drift away from things, distance myself, dream and illusionize, paint stuff, write stuff, create stuff; and I call her the Solitary Artist. And occasionally, I slip and fall back into my so called irresponsible, judgeless youth, where all that really matters are drinks and dances and the most primitive kind of passion - that would be the Careless Teen. Guess there are more to it as well, like the Teacher Trainee, embracing troubled kids, or the Famous Local, loving her job at the gas station, and the Poor University Student Constantly Complaining About How Poor She Is; but they are all minor, compared to the first four.
Battered Old Lady likes nothing. She dislikes nothing, either. She does nothing but cry, or possibly stare dully at some point on the wall. This is all because she thinks everything she does is useless, and won't matter to a soul, especially not to the world on the whole, which is the only thing she considers matters. Got it? Battered Old Lady will do nothing, because to the world, she is merely a drop of sea water in the Atlantic if even that, maybe slightly more considering her contributions of tears. Instead, she will be sad about the condition everything's in and how hopeless it is for it ever to change. The state of the world saddens her, but she is so blinded and overwhelmed by the sadness that she does not attempt to change it.
Battered Old Lady can appear at any time. Sometimes when simply hearing the news. Sometimes in the middle of Jiggery-Pokery's laughter, because honest laughter makes Battered Old Lady choke and force herself to come forth, preventing anything becoming too happy, too satisfied, too enjoyable. If the world is so troubled, Battered Old Lady considers, she has no right to be any less troubled than the rest, just because she is materialistically better off. And being troubled all the time inflates her conscience with the twisted idea that being chronically depressed is sort of her compensation for never actively struggling for what she sees.
Jiggery-Pokery is a blast. She doesn't see consequences, she doesn't think of practical things. She plays around, and finds pleasure in the smallest of things, smiles at the littlest of thoughts. Jiggery-Pokery thinks it's still not too late to get that craved letter from Hogwarts, and loves the way it sounds when she kicks a piece of gravel against hot asfalt. The furthest away from home she's ever been and ever heard about is simply as far as to the sea, where you can play in the waves and build castles in the sand and play with sticks and stones in, and where Mum and Dad brings lemonade and sandwiches for when you get hungry, and dry towels for when you get wet. The sea, from where you don't ever have to go home, where the family is always together, always laughing. Jiggery-Pokery loves the sea, and will never leave it.
Solitary Artist is a loner. She enjoys the company of herself, and logically, why shouldn't she? She is, after all, the only person she can be absolutely certain that she'll spend the rest of her life with. Solitary Artist draws, writes, sings, simply creates, anything that comes to mind. She is very emotional, but mostly expresses her feelings through her creations. When she is making something, she disappears from the world, distances herself, drifts off... dreams herself away, unintentionally. When she's done, she might show her work to someone, thought most of the time she stuffs it somewhere, unseen, where she can keep it safe for other times. Solitary Artist makes time fly. Hours can pass without her noticing. Solitary Artist is mostly left to herself by the others, but unfortunately, appears more and more seldom as years come.
Careless Teen is different from Solitary Artist. She doesn't bare the company of herself, she's only happy when she's surrounded by people. If she finds herself alone, she makes herself busy with something, anything at hand, so as not having to think about things. Sometimes she is interrupted in this by Battered Old Lady, almost as if that is who she becomes when she does that dangerous thing thinking. Careless Teen thinks a weekend without alcohol is a waste of time, that a day without hearing from any of her friends is like a plague. Careless Teen does loads of things to occupy herself, and to keep her schedule crammed, so that she can feel wanted, needed, confirmed, by the people around her. And so she does anything to be accepted by them. Foolish things, at times. Other times she does things that only benefit herself, hurts people, not willingly, but because she is swept away by the moment far too often. Careless Teen hates work and thinks her folks are ungrateful to her for what she does for them, unlike Jiggery-Pokery, who would beam at work, and love every ounce of it. Careless Teen sometimes wishes to hurt herself so that someone might see her, so that someone might reach out and touch her. Careless Teen is blind to who is good for her and who cares about her, and sometimes sees nothing when there is so much there, or sees so much where there is nothing to be seen. Careless Teen would never stop to think, because her way of living would break down her conscience if she did.
Do you see how all these fit into one person? How they all are parts of one person, parts of me? When I look at what I've written, it seems absurd that they should all be sides of one person, but they are.
They are all just parts of me.
Battered Old Lady likes nothing. She dislikes nothing, either. She does nothing but cry, or possibly stare dully at some point on the wall. This is all because she thinks everything she does is useless, and won't matter to a soul, especially not to the world on the whole, which is the only thing she considers matters. Got it? Battered Old Lady will do nothing, because to the world, she is merely a drop of sea water in the Atlantic if even that, maybe slightly more considering her contributions of tears. Instead, she will be sad about the condition everything's in and how hopeless it is for it ever to change. The state of the world saddens her, but she is so blinded and overwhelmed by the sadness that she does not attempt to change it.
Battered Old Lady can appear at any time. Sometimes when simply hearing the news. Sometimes in the middle of Jiggery-Pokery's laughter, because honest laughter makes Battered Old Lady choke and force herself to come forth, preventing anything becoming too happy, too satisfied, too enjoyable. If the world is so troubled, Battered Old Lady considers, she has no right to be any less troubled than the rest, just because she is materialistically better off. And being troubled all the time inflates her conscience with the twisted idea that being chronically depressed is sort of her compensation for never actively struggling for what she sees.
Jiggery-Pokery is a blast. She doesn't see consequences, she doesn't think of practical things. She plays around, and finds pleasure in the smallest of things, smiles at the littlest of thoughts. Jiggery-Pokery thinks it's still not too late to get that craved letter from Hogwarts, and loves the way it sounds when she kicks a piece of gravel against hot asfalt. The furthest away from home she's ever been and ever heard about is simply as far as to the sea, where you can play in the waves and build castles in the sand and play with sticks and stones in, and where Mum and Dad brings lemonade and sandwiches for when you get hungry, and dry towels for when you get wet. The sea, from where you don't ever have to go home, where the family is always together, always laughing. Jiggery-Pokery loves the sea, and will never leave it.
Solitary Artist is a loner. She enjoys the company of herself, and logically, why shouldn't she? She is, after all, the only person she can be absolutely certain that she'll spend the rest of her life with. Solitary Artist draws, writes, sings, simply creates, anything that comes to mind. She is very emotional, but mostly expresses her feelings through her creations. When she is making something, she disappears from the world, distances herself, drifts off... dreams herself away, unintentionally. When she's done, she might show her work to someone, thought most of the time she stuffs it somewhere, unseen, where she can keep it safe for other times. Solitary Artist makes time fly. Hours can pass without her noticing. Solitary Artist is mostly left to herself by the others, but unfortunately, appears more and more seldom as years come.
Careless Teen is different from Solitary Artist. She doesn't bare the company of herself, she's only happy when she's surrounded by people. If she finds herself alone, she makes herself busy with something, anything at hand, so as not having to think about things. Sometimes she is interrupted in this by Battered Old Lady, almost as if that is who she becomes when she does that dangerous thing thinking. Careless Teen thinks a weekend without alcohol is a waste of time, that a day without hearing from any of her friends is like a plague. Careless Teen does loads of things to occupy herself, and to keep her schedule crammed, so that she can feel wanted, needed, confirmed, by the people around her. And so she does anything to be accepted by them. Foolish things, at times. Other times she does things that only benefit herself, hurts people, not willingly, but because she is swept away by the moment far too often. Careless Teen hates work and thinks her folks are ungrateful to her for what she does for them, unlike Jiggery-Pokery, who would beam at work, and love every ounce of it. Careless Teen sometimes wishes to hurt herself so that someone might see her, so that someone might reach out and touch her. Careless Teen is blind to who is good for her and who cares about her, and sometimes sees nothing when there is so much there, or sees so much where there is nothing to be seen. Careless Teen would never stop to think, because her way of living would break down her conscience if she did.
Do you see how all these fit into one person? How they all are parts of one person, parts of me? When I look at what I've written, it seems absurd that they should all be sides of one person, but they are.
They are all just parts of me.
Friday, July 27
Follow The Moment, Follow The Dream
I'm empty inside me
It's like a hole that grows in size
I'm guilty so do blame me
For all you saw with blinded eyes
With blinded eyes
Follow the moment, follow the dream
Catch the glimmer you see in a sparkling thought
Follow the moment, follow the dream
If things are what they seem, well then
Don't wait up for me
Come darkness, embrace me
Come fill the hole I got in me
And goodness, desert me
So that my record's clear of lies
Clear of lies
Come turn your misery on me
Take out your anger on me please
And while you look the other way
The rest can get away
I saved them
I saved them
With my sacrifice
Follow the moment, follow the dream
Catch the glimmer you see in a sparkling thought
Follow the moment, follow the dream
If things are what they seem, well then
Don't wait up for me
____________________________________
The inspiration for this song actually came from The Deathly Hallows, but I think it has a lot of other depth as well. What do you say? Enjoy, people!
It's like a hole that grows in size
I'm guilty so do blame me
For all you saw with blinded eyes
With blinded eyes
Follow the moment, follow the dream
Catch the glimmer you see in a sparkling thought
Follow the moment, follow the dream
If things are what they seem, well then
Don't wait up for me
Come darkness, embrace me
Come fill the hole I got in me
And goodness, desert me
So that my record's clear of lies
Clear of lies
Come turn your misery on me
Take out your anger on me please
And while you look the other way
The rest can get away
I saved them
I saved them
With my sacrifice
Follow the moment, follow the dream
Catch the glimmer you see in a sparkling thought
Follow the moment, follow the dream
If things are what they seem, well then
Don't wait up for me
____________________________________
The inspiration for this song actually came from The Deathly Hallows, but I think it has a lot of other depth as well. What do you say? Enjoy, people!
Tuesday, July 24
Angel With Doll
Here's a little something I drew the other day at work when I was bored. Now I'm working on, like, a copy of it, the angel and her replica is standing face to face, each holding their doll, watching the silhouette of a butterfly glowing between them. I'm gonna add that picture soon as it's done, meanwhile, I thought this little sweetheart was too pretty to stay in the notepad. Enjoy.
Sunday, July 22
Downtown
Here I am, in the middle of a drawing, and it's been ages since I been so enthusiastic about my painting, and what happens? My cell rings, and all of a sudden, I'm on my way downtown to grab some drinks with Nikki and Terese. I dunno how the hell that happened, but nevertheless - can't complain about the evening. Didn't know a soul, that didn't really matter. Didn't know the music either, but hey, a pub that's dragged someone's Playstation 2 into the DJ booth and chooses music after what's next on Guitar Hero, well, they gotta get their fair amount of credit, right?
Anyway, Mum'll show up soon with the rest of our laundry, and then we're headed for pizza. Over & Out. I know I'm boring... but I'm hungover. Don't complain...
Anyway, Mum'll show up soon with the rest of our laundry, and then we're headed for pizza. Over & Out. I know I'm boring... but I'm hungover. Don't complain...
Saturday, July 21
Road
I don't even know what I wanna put up here.
Feels like no one knows me. No one's got the time for me.
Everyone's getting the hell out of here... and I don't have a clue what to do when they're gone. What am I supposed to do? Dammit... I'm gonna spend eternity in this shit hole before I can get out. Before I'll wanna get out. You know, I thought if I just stayed here things would kinda stay the way they've been, they wouldn't change. Like, in the back of my mind, I was thinking I could keep being my old self around here. But that's changed. Nothing's what it used to be, hell, I aint what I used to be.
Where am I headed? Can someone please tell? Should I stick to following this road, or try to have another go? Well I don't know...
Feels like no one knows me. No one's got the time for me.
Everyone's getting the hell out of here... and I don't have a clue what to do when they're gone. What am I supposed to do? Dammit... I'm gonna spend eternity in this shit hole before I can get out. Before I'll wanna get out. You know, I thought if I just stayed here things would kinda stay the way they've been, they wouldn't change. Like, in the back of my mind, I was thinking I could keep being my old self around here. But that's changed. Nothing's what it used to be, hell, I aint what I used to be.
Where am I headed? Can someone please tell? Should I stick to following this road, or try to have another go? Well I don't know...
Thursday, July 19
Daydreams
This choice is hard for anyone to make
To tell authentic from what's fake
I slant my head to catch the voices
Voices that wake me
From my daydreams
Wish that I could sleep some more
Not wonder what I came here for
Close my eyes to chase my dreams
Dreams that take me
From reality
___________________________________
Why, that plan worked out trumendously, now didn't it? Argh, it's like I've got it all worked out in my head, got the path set out straight for me, and when it's time to follow it - go down the path I'm supposed to go - I grow so weary I'll surrender... I wonder when it's time for me... When it's my turn to rise and shine. When I'll actually be able to deal with this... my life... and the inevitable end of it as I know it...
I know what's best for me and I know what the voices tell me. Don't get it, why this feels so hard... so wrong. Can I really allow myself to be happy about it? It goes against everything. Most things... That I've worked for. That... that I am.
I don't know, I might be hell wrong here, but I'm pretty confused about things still. And I want me to gimme some answers now, this very minute. Not just wait it out. I'm sick of not knowing what I want to do, or who I want to be - or, more precisely, I'm sick of it being so important to me to know that. I wish I could just have fun with life and enjoy it as it is... No prejudices allowed.
To tell authentic from what's fake
I slant my head to catch the voices
Voices that wake me
From my daydreams
Wish that I could sleep some more
Not wonder what I came here for
Close my eyes to chase my dreams
Dreams that take me
From reality
___________________________________
Why, that plan worked out trumendously, now didn't it? Argh, it's like I've got it all worked out in my head, got the path set out straight for me, and when it's time to follow it - go down the path I'm supposed to go - I grow so weary I'll surrender... I wonder when it's time for me... When it's my turn to rise and shine. When I'll actually be able to deal with this... my life... and the inevitable end of it as I know it...
I know what's best for me and I know what the voices tell me. Don't get it, why this feels so hard... so wrong. Can I really allow myself to be happy about it? It goes against everything. Most things... That I've worked for. That... that I am.
I don't know, I might be hell wrong here, but I'm pretty confused about things still. And I want me to gimme some answers now, this very minute. Not just wait it out. I'm sick of not knowing what I want to do, or who I want to be - or, more precisely, I'm sick of it being so important to me to know that. I wish I could just have fun with life and enjoy it as it is... No prejudices allowed.
Wednesday, July 18
Scream, Live, And Tuck My Life Out The Window With The Trash
There comes a time for speechmaking,
it simply isn't now.
_________________________________
I don't even know where to start, feels like my own way of living my life is striking back on me. Can't complain, can't do anything, cause that would mean I was contradictory, complaining 'bout other folks when they do things... you know, when other people do it it bugs you, but when you do it it bugs you that it bugs other folks that you do it... As in "Bugs" episode of the Diaries.
I just wanna break free!
I can't help but admire people who are stronger than me, who do whatever they want to do, who don't let other stuff stand in the way. Like, I wanna head off to Australia too, just 'cause, hey, I feel like it. I wanna go party like crazy with my pals without worrying shit about when I get home or if I don't!
I wanna do my own dishes, wanna fold my own clothes, want to sort my movies, have a place to go - a hideout, only for me...
Wanna stand on top of this bloody house and SCREAM!
I wanna be someone! I wanna see places, meet people, LIVE!
I wanna grab hold of my life and tuck it out the window along with the trash!
I'm gonna be someone and I'm gonna show you... I'm gonna show you that I can do with all this alone...
it simply isn't now.
_________________________________
I don't even know where to start, feels like my own way of living my life is striking back on me. Can't complain, can't do anything, cause that would mean I was contradictory, complaining 'bout other folks when they do things... you know, when other people do it it bugs you, but when you do it it bugs you that it bugs other folks that you do it... As in "Bugs" episode of the Diaries.
I just wanna break free!
I can't help but admire people who are stronger than me, who do whatever they want to do, who don't let other stuff stand in the way. Like, I wanna head off to Australia too, just 'cause, hey, I feel like it. I wanna go party like crazy with my pals without worrying shit about when I get home or if I don't!
I wanna do my own dishes, wanna fold my own clothes, want to sort my movies, have a place to go - a hideout, only for me...
Wanna stand on top of this bloody house and SCREAM!
I wanna be someone! I wanna see places, meet people, LIVE!
I wanna grab hold of my life and tuck it out the window along with the trash!
I'm gonna be someone and I'm gonna show you... I'm gonna show you that I can do with all this alone...
Sunday, July 15
Seize The Day
I'm gonna be amazing but I'm still growing,
I'm gonna be a torch but for now I'm only glowing.
Whatever happens I'm okay,
Whatever happens I'll seize the day.
I'm gonna be something good but I'm still learning,
I'm gonna light up lives but can't control my burning.
Whatever happens I'm okay,
Whatever happens I'll seize the day.
You knew I was a bird when you saw me about,
I've learnt to live in cages but I'll always want out.
I'll be ready for you when all this is done,
I'll be ready when hunger no longer will come.
Whatever happens, we'll be okay,
Whatever happens we can seize the day.
Whenever I'm sane and not deranged,
Whatever happens... I'll seize the day.
I'm gonna be a torch but for now I'm only glowing.
Whatever happens I'm okay,
Whatever happens I'll seize the day.
I'm gonna be something good but I'm still learning,
I'm gonna light up lives but can't control my burning.
Whatever happens I'm okay,
Whatever happens I'll seize the day.
You knew I was a bird when you saw me about,
I've learnt to live in cages but I'll always want out.
I'll be ready for you when all this is done,
I'll be ready when hunger no longer will come.
Whatever happens, we'll be okay,
Whatever happens we can seize the day.
Whenever I'm sane and not deranged,
Whatever happens... I'll seize the day.
Summer's Got Started
Right, so this is it, I'm writing you from the grave as promised. Haha, not really, I aint even hungover yet; bet that'll kick in when I'm at work tomorrow.
Anyway, I thought our night out in Grebbestad would be cancelled considering how much it was raining, I mean, it was like a vertical lake right outside my window. But somehow we didn't let ourselves be scared off by that, which was lucky - we didn't get a drop of rain all night once we were there. It was a really nice evening in all, we went in on this place called Terrassen (flirted my way in past the guards - well it must have been something like that, or I don't know how they let me in) and spent like the rest of the evening dancing like freaks. It was cool. Wish I had some photos of us, didn't even think of shooting some. Maybe that's good, you know, that you had so much fun you don't even have time to take pictures. It feels kinda nice come to think of it, like the summer just started. This is like, how fun the rest of the summer will be. And finally - finally - it feels like I can enjoy myself. Like I told Nikki, even though I missed him a lot while he was gone this week, every day I had to cope with was a day I grew stronger, and happier about myself, more independent. That's why I'm thinking I'm really making the right decision about moving out.
I'm wrestling my head with a tough decision right now, don't know if I should tell about what.
Now there's no more rain, folks - let's seize the day.
From The Poet In The Jar: It's spontaneous thoughts, everyone.
Anyway, I thought our night out in Grebbestad would be cancelled considering how much it was raining, I mean, it was like a vertical lake right outside my window. But somehow we didn't let ourselves be scared off by that, which was lucky - we didn't get a drop of rain all night once we were there. It was a really nice evening in all, we went in on this place called Terrassen (flirted my way in past the guards - well it must have been something like that, or I don't know how they let me in) and spent like the rest of the evening dancing like freaks. It was cool. Wish I had some photos of us, didn't even think of shooting some. Maybe that's good, you know, that you had so much fun you don't even have time to take pictures. It feels kinda nice come to think of it, like the summer just started. This is like, how fun the rest of the summer will be. And finally - finally - it feels like I can enjoy myself. Like I told Nikki, even though I missed him a lot while he was gone this week, every day I had to cope with was a day I grew stronger, and happier about myself, more independent. That's why I'm thinking I'm really making the right decision about moving out.
I'm wrestling my head with a tough decision right now, don't know if I should tell about what.
Now there's no more rain, folks - let's seize the day.
From The Poet In The Jar: It's spontaneous thoughts, everyone.
Saturday, July 14
Halfway Through, Halfdead Already
Right, so I'm only half-dead, but then I'm only halfway through my weekend plans. I've just had a banana for breakfast and I'm starving. Gotta go see if I got something else in the fridge, or my stomach will jump up my throat and suffocate me out of pure frustration.
The movie yesterday was freakin' A-W-E-S-O-M-E. Best one this far! Exactly what I thought about the book when that premiered, though we've agreed they aint really comparable, the books and the films. You can simply not squeeze the depths of the books into a watchable, reasonable length movie. But I'm happy with it, it was a fairly adapted film version, for sure. I'm thinking whoever did the casting did an amazing job (except for the kind of weird-looking Tonks), couldn't help but love Loony Lovegood, and want to jump on Umbridge. Guess that's exactly the desired effect, but still. Yeah, I think it was good. My sis sneaked a bottle of Bacardi Breezer into the salon which she drank from with a straw. It looked a little desperate, ha, ha.
Afterwards we went out, my sis, her friend and me. Wasn't sure if I felt comfortable with them - like that friend of my sis, who couldn't stop complaining that she couldn't dance to "this kind of music", or pointing out every single guy in the place she'd ever made out with. It was like, yeah. I'll just stand here dancing, then. And on the way back this guy kinda jumped on me, like so-where-are-you-from, where-are-you-going-now, how-come-I've-never-seen-you-before and, last but not least, would-you-like-a-piece-of-my-hamburger and can-I-at-least-give-you-a-hug. It would'ave been more fun to get compliments like my sis, this was definitely desperate, just like every other guy at the place whose only form of compliment was like, ass-grabbing. No fun. Whaddaya think guys, that if you grab my ass I'm comin' home with ya? What makes you even think it would be even the slightest bit appreciated? Come back when you've learned that what a girl wants is free drinks, smiles, eye contact and some honest attention. Don't forget, non-drunk. Now get outta here! I hope you're all laying in some ditch somewhere, hungover as hell. I bet my hangover won't pop up until tonight, but then I'll already be getting myself a new one, so it won't matter. Hopefully... Dear God, please don't let this have any effect on my brain cells. I kinda need them later when I'm supposed to go back to school.
Regular work hours begin on Monday, which sucks. Sucks sucks sucks. Well, I aint gonna dwell about it. Just go there, do the time, get out. And look! You're free. Do what ya like.
The movie yesterday was freakin' A-W-E-S-O-M-E. Best one this far! Exactly what I thought about the book when that premiered, though we've agreed they aint really comparable, the books and the films. You can simply not squeeze the depths of the books into a watchable, reasonable length movie. But I'm happy with it, it was a fairly adapted film version, for sure. I'm thinking whoever did the casting did an amazing job (except for the kind of weird-looking Tonks), couldn't help but love Loony Lovegood, and want to jump on Umbridge. Guess that's exactly the desired effect, but still. Yeah, I think it was good. My sis sneaked a bottle of Bacardi Breezer into the salon which she drank from with a straw. It looked a little desperate, ha, ha.
Afterwards we went out, my sis, her friend and me. Wasn't sure if I felt comfortable with them - like that friend of my sis, who couldn't stop complaining that she couldn't dance to "this kind of music", or pointing out every single guy in the place she'd ever made out with. It was like, yeah. I'll just stand here dancing, then. And on the way back this guy kinda jumped on me, like so-where-are-you-from, where-are-you-going-now, how-come-I've-never-seen-you-before and, last but not least, would-you-like-a-piece-of-my-hamburger and can-I-at-least-give-you-a-hug. It would'ave been more fun to get compliments like my sis, this was definitely desperate, just like every other guy at the place whose only form of compliment was like, ass-grabbing. No fun. Whaddaya think guys, that if you grab my ass I'm comin' home with ya? What makes you even think it would be even the slightest bit appreciated? Come back when you've learned that what a girl wants is free drinks, smiles, eye contact and some honest attention. Don't forget, non-drunk. Now get outta here! I hope you're all laying in some ditch somewhere, hungover as hell. I bet my hangover won't pop up until tonight, but then I'll already be getting myself a new one, so it won't matter. Hopefully... Dear God, please don't let this have any effect on my brain cells. I kinda need them later when I'm supposed to go back to school.
Regular work hours begin on Monday, which sucks. Sucks sucks sucks. Well, I aint gonna dwell about it. Just go there, do the time, get out. And look! You're free. Do what ya like.
Friday, July 13
Bugs
I'm waiting for my sis to come over and get some party started. She was only supposed to be here an hour ago. Ha, ha. Well, I guess I better not complain about folks being late, seeing that I'm always late for everything myself. How does that happen? When other people do it it bugs you, but when you do it it bugs you that it bugs other folks that you do it. Did you get that? Better write it down somewhere.
Plan for tonight is The Order of the Phoenix, I laid my hands on tickets for the premiere - barely, considering there were only five ones left when I bought 'em. After that, we go out, have some fun, dance a little, drink a little, hang out a little. Plan for tomorrow is, hitch ourselves a ride to the coast somehow, have fun, dance a lot, drink a lot, hang out a lot. Plan for Sunday is, I'm dead. Write you from the grave boys and girls.
Plan for tonight is The Order of the Phoenix, I laid my hands on tickets for the premiere - barely, considering there were only five ones left when I bought 'em. After that, we go out, have some fun, dance a little, drink a little, hang out a little. Plan for tomorrow is, hitch ourselves a ride to the coast somehow, have fun, dance a lot, drink a lot, hang out a lot. Plan for Sunday is, I'm dead. Write you from the grave boys and girls.
Thursday, July 12
Redecoration
I'm redecorating my head by redecorating my living room. Right now it looks as if there's been some kind of very violent struggle in here, spreading stuff to all possible and impossible places making itself impossible to find when I need it, just to show up again and request a storage place when there are none left. Hey, I guess this room has more in common with my head than I'd thought!
I haven't seen Nikki since yesterday morning, and I kinda miss him. I'm doing fine daytime, but it gets freakishly lonely when you're going to bed. No more, I'll-go-to-bed-when-you-do-darling, for a couple days. You know, I was thinking if I got a few days away from Nikki I'd just relax and not do much, just hang out with myself, like. But instead it feels as though I've scheduled something for every hour we're apart.
I'd better fix things up in here, although I woulda wanted to catch Danny on msn before I do so. Would be nice if maybe we could get a lift if there's any of them driving on Saturday.
Gotta set this place up... nightie!
PS. This pic is without the big painting on top, I'll put it up tomorrow if I'm bored, haha. DS. FROM THE POET
I haven't seen Nikki since yesterday morning, and I kinda miss him. I'm doing fine daytime, but it gets freakishly lonely when you're going to bed. No more, I'll-go-to-bed-when-you-do-darling, for a couple days. You know, I was thinking if I got a few days away from Nikki I'd just relax and not do much, just hang out with myself, like. But instead it feels as though I've scheduled something for every hour we're apart.
I'd better fix things up in here, although I woulda wanted to catch Danny on msn before I do so. Would be nice if maybe we could get a lift if there's any of them driving on Saturday.
Gotta set this place up... nightie!
PS. This pic is without the big painting on top, I'll put it up tomorrow if I'm bored, haha. DS. FROM THE POET
Tuesday, July 10
Hippocracy Present
Everything is so full of crap. Like this:
"EXTRA! EXTRA! 16-year old girl died from gas-leaking fridge"
What? How is this extra? It's as if they thought we suck in news for fun. And Extra news are Extra fun. Oh wow, look, it's the special edition of the gas-leaking fridge tragedy - I gotta have me one of those! Or what?
On the tobacco cabinet: "Prince Highland Taste. Smooth and fresh with aromas straight from the highlands"
On the tobacco package: "Smoking kills"
Guess we can't blame smokers' bad habit on the disability to read anymore. I was apparently wrong. They can read big letters as in cigarette commercial signs. Just not the small ones on the package. I'm so sorry, my bad.
Yeah, what the hell.
You know what I mean.
"EXTRA! EXTRA! 16-year old girl died from gas-leaking fridge"
What? How is this extra? It's as if they thought we suck in news for fun. And Extra news are Extra fun. Oh wow, look, it's the special edition of the gas-leaking fridge tragedy - I gotta have me one of those! Or what?
On the tobacco cabinet: "Prince Highland Taste. Smooth and fresh with aromas straight from the highlands"
On the tobacco package: "Smoking kills"
Guess we can't blame smokers' bad habit on the disability to read anymore. I was apparently wrong. They can read big letters as in cigarette commercial signs. Just not the small ones on the package. I'm so sorry, my bad.
Yeah, what the hell.
You know what I mean.
Monday, July 9
War-Wager
I drew before. Made a drawing of a girl with big, black eyes and hair that's blue and purple. It's been a while since I last drew something. I take it as a sign. Things getting better and all. If that's what you call it.
Having to switch back to my old job at the gas station which I loath, from the amazing job I just been at in summer school, man, that takes most my energy straight off just by the thought of it. The Health Care Authoritities are coming to inspect us at work, which means two weeks of hard sanitation and cleaning work for me. I'm simply thrilled. Golly, gimme a broom and I could sweep the world clean of trouble while I'm at it, yeay! That would kinda be the same amount of effort. God knows what we'll find at that place, Mum and Dad never got the time to fix it, and while I'm there, grabbing hold of the cleaning in one end - it always fills up in the other. But it's kinda good though, I guess, time will fly by; before I know it I'll be back home again.
And who knows? It just might inspire a poem or two. Ha, ha.
Like David, one of the other teachers at summer school said: when you do body work, like tearing down houses all day, you can work for fifteen hours and still you aint tired, cause you know you can be somewhere else in your head. But doing something like teaching, you do eight hours of work and you're exhausted. Cause you don't just need your body, you need your head as well. And you got eyes on you. Judging you, every second. Every mistake you make, every ounce of uncertainness that flinches your body, will be turned against you.
And I thought that was fun. Man, what am I complaining about? This cleaning'll be like piece of cake. I'm gonna do like in Harry Potter number five, and wage war on that place. Ha, ha. Wish me luck!
ByEbYe
Having to switch back to my old job at the gas station which I loath, from the amazing job I just been at in summer school, man, that takes most my energy straight off just by the thought of it. The Health Care Authoritities are coming to inspect us at work, which means two weeks of hard sanitation and cleaning work for me. I'm simply thrilled. Golly, gimme a broom and I could sweep the world clean of trouble while I'm at it, yeay! That would kinda be the same amount of effort. God knows what we'll find at that place, Mum and Dad never got the time to fix it, and while I'm there, grabbing hold of the cleaning in one end - it always fills up in the other. But it's kinda good though, I guess, time will fly by; before I know it I'll be back home again.
And who knows? It just might inspire a poem or two. Ha, ha.
Like David, one of the other teachers at summer school said: when you do body work, like tearing down houses all day, you can work for fifteen hours and still you aint tired, cause you know you can be somewhere else in your head. But doing something like teaching, you do eight hours of work and you're exhausted. Cause you don't just need your body, you need your head as well. And you got eyes on you. Judging you, every second. Every mistake you make, every ounce of uncertainness that flinches your body, will be turned against you.
And I thought that was fun. Man, what am I complaining about? This cleaning'll be like piece of cake. I'm gonna do like in Harry Potter number five, and wage war on that place. Ha, ha. Wish me luck!
ByEbYe
Sunday, July 8
Cast Away
Childhood, you were my mainland,
and now I'm cast away.
Death was the waves that rode me here,
Illness what tore my sails.
Safe waters are no more to me.
Wild waters grieve and roar with me.
Innocence was my mainland,
and now I'm cast away.
_______________________________
Right, so it's out.
Out of my life, out of my mind, out of the tears we can't deny...
I feel so relieved having gotten it out of me. We spent a long time talking yesterday, Nikki and me. I wanna, but shouldn't, write about the details, so I won't. What matters is that we've agreed to see how things work if we move apart from eachother, and take it from there. Nikki says it's better that I told the truth than I go crying, without explaining why. Well, I've explained now. And at least I got it out of me. At least now we both know. We'll see. I dunno what's gonna happen now.
Friday night didn't end too well. I feel sorry for Jessi, cause I kinda think my gloomy mood was dragging her down a bit, I couldn't help it. I spoke to Elle in the bar. Yeah I know, it's kind of a cliché, haha. Anyway, after that I burst out of the place and Nikki came after me and I ruined my makeup and had to wipe it off on the inside of his shirt. I think it was one of his best shirts, too. Sorry 'bout that. That's what got me started. I thought if I don't tell him this now, I never will. I waited til yesterday. And Nikki's so good to me, he always listens to me, even when it's hard for me to say something. I'm so very fond of him.
You know, I couldn't really tell why, but it feels as if it's almost impossible to become myself again, long as I'm with someone. Not just Nikki, but anyone. It would be easier to find myself again if I had to do it on my own. Do it from scratch. But I dunno, let's see how this works out, maybe an apartment of my own is exactly what it would take for me to do it, find me, find myself. I dunno. Really dunno. I feel pretty happy about things now, though.
Haven't told Mum about all this. She's got too much to worry about as it is, and besides, she's already going mental on me for moving out, she thinks I'll break up with Nikki soon as I'm out, so with her it don't matter what I say. I just don't have the energy to face her with this kind of stuff, cause I know she'll start to fix things up and make plans for me and do stuff, and mostly she does more damage than she does good, even though she means well.
Oh God, I'm worried sick about my Mum. And there's nothing I can do. Why does it always have to be like this, why do people have to get sick? Why can't they just be, fine? And why doesn't time stop when they do...? Everything, things, just keep happening, keep going on, as if nothing's changed. But they have changed. I've changed, everyone's changed. I wanna go back to my past, when we were kids, when all you had to worry about was who to play with the next day. When illness was just something vague we still remembered from Carolina. And when death was still unreal, something absent, unknown.
Childhood, you were my mainland, and now I'm cast away.
and now I'm cast away.
Death was the waves that rode me here,
Illness what tore my sails.
Safe waters are no more to me.
Wild waters grieve and roar with me.
Innocence was my mainland,
and now I'm cast away.
_______________________________
Right, so it's out.
Out of my life, out of my mind, out of the tears we can't deny...
I feel so relieved having gotten it out of me. We spent a long time talking yesterday, Nikki and me. I wanna, but shouldn't, write about the details, so I won't. What matters is that we've agreed to see how things work if we move apart from eachother, and take it from there. Nikki says it's better that I told the truth than I go crying, without explaining why. Well, I've explained now. And at least I got it out of me. At least now we both know. We'll see. I dunno what's gonna happen now.
Friday night didn't end too well. I feel sorry for Jessi, cause I kinda think my gloomy mood was dragging her down a bit, I couldn't help it. I spoke to Elle in the bar. Yeah I know, it's kind of a cliché, haha. Anyway, after that I burst out of the place and Nikki came after me and I ruined my makeup and had to wipe it off on the inside of his shirt. I think it was one of his best shirts, too. Sorry 'bout that. That's what got me started. I thought if I don't tell him this now, I never will. I waited til yesterday. And Nikki's so good to me, he always listens to me, even when it's hard for me to say something. I'm so very fond of him.
You know, I couldn't really tell why, but it feels as if it's almost impossible to become myself again, long as I'm with someone. Not just Nikki, but anyone. It would be easier to find myself again if I had to do it on my own. Do it from scratch. But I dunno, let's see how this works out, maybe an apartment of my own is exactly what it would take for me to do it, find me, find myself. I dunno. Really dunno. I feel pretty happy about things now, though.
Haven't told Mum about all this. She's got too much to worry about as it is, and besides, she's already going mental on me for moving out, she thinks I'll break up with Nikki soon as I'm out, so with her it don't matter what I say. I just don't have the energy to face her with this kind of stuff, cause I know she'll start to fix things up and make plans for me and do stuff, and mostly she does more damage than she does good, even though she means well.
Oh God, I'm worried sick about my Mum. And there's nothing I can do. Why does it always have to be like this, why do people have to get sick? Why can't they just be, fine? And why doesn't time stop when they do...? Everything, things, just keep happening, keep going on, as if nothing's changed. But they have changed. I've changed, everyone's changed. I wanna go back to my past, when we were kids, when all you had to worry about was who to play with the next day. When illness was just something vague we still remembered from Carolina. And when death was still unreal, something absent, unknown.
Childhood, you were my mainland, and now I'm cast away.
Okay
We've spoken. Done the serious talking.
Things are changing.
Hope we'll be okay.
Good'night.
//Bekki Lee//
Things are changing.
Hope we'll be okay.
Good'night.
//Bekki Lee//
Saturday, July 7
Two Reasonable Halves
One half of me believes:
Things might change.
You'll stay within range.
The other half leaves:
Wants to save me.
Not betray me.
But I don't know
what to say.
Which way to go.
Who to trust,
out of two
reasonable
halves.
______________________________
I feel as though I'm split in half. Yesterday didn't end too well, with me sitting on the stone stairs crying. Trying to tell Nikki that I need time. I need to be by myself for a while. He thinks it'll be better when we move apart, but I'm not sure. Maybe what I really need is a clean break, so that maybe somehow I can build a strong self again. I'm only halfway there as it is, and I think living like this is preventing me from going all the way. I miss being on my own, I used to have fun with things. And when I am alone, nowadays, I'm so happy with it, it feels good not having to take responsibility for someone else, just for a while. But I don't want that for a while, I want to have that all the time. I just don't know how to say it. I just don't know where to start. Hand it over after dinner? Or after the laundry has been done? And it's so silly that I keep prolonging it, if I don't do it today, I won't have done it in two months.
Please help me.
Things might change.
You'll stay within range.
The other half leaves:
Wants to save me.
Not betray me.
But I don't know
what to say.
Which way to go.
Who to trust,
out of two
reasonable
halves.
______________________________
I feel as though I'm split in half. Yesterday didn't end too well, with me sitting on the stone stairs crying. Trying to tell Nikki that I need time. I need to be by myself for a while. He thinks it'll be better when we move apart, but I'm not sure. Maybe what I really need is a clean break, so that maybe somehow I can build a strong self again. I'm only halfway there as it is, and I think living like this is preventing me from going all the way. I miss being on my own, I used to have fun with things. And when I am alone, nowadays, I'm so happy with it, it feels good not having to take responsibility for someone else, just for a while. But I don't want that for a while, I want to have that all the time. I just don't know how to say it. I just don't know where to start. Hand it over after dinner? Or after the laundry has been done? And it's so silly that I keep prolonging it, if I don't do it today, I won't have done it in two months.
Please help me.
Thursday, July 5
Let Me Hate You
Why does it always feel as if every time you're thinking you're doing allright, something strikes you down, sweeps your feet away, alters everything. Every time! A couple of days ago one of my best friends told me that I've become different than before, that I don't laugh as much, I aint crazy the way I used to be. That I've gone grey somehow. And the worst part is I kinda have to agree with her. I don't wanna live like this, like some ant in the stack working its ass off to please everyone else, to secure the survival of their kind.
It's my family we're talking about, they are my kind in blood and bonds, even though in other ways we are very different. I do all that I can for my family. Dad's still not well, so he don't have the energy to work full time, and Mum, she can't work at all any more. Caroline's fired and they can't afford to hire Mikael full time, only 75 percent. Before I knew this, I asked Mum for, let's see, four days off, so that I could recover slightly from the teaching job and spend some time with Nikki before he leaves. Apparently, that makes me a lazy, irresponsible imbecil, according to my sister, who suddenly has to come down from Stockholm to relieve my parents from work. How does that add up? No one even asked me to come to work before they called my sister. Course I would have done it, what else would I do? But obviously, my parents thought it best for me to rest, since I'm the lazy, irresponsible, egoistic daughter, and ask my sister to travel half across the country to fix things up. It just feels like I aint worth shit. No, let's ask Anchi instead, she probably needs a break from the big city life and the hard day's work of not doing shit. Come on, how many times haven't I been there, how many times didn't I do anything that you asked me?
Mum and Dad, you know I love you, but you've got to let me hate you for a while.
poet IN THE jar
It's my family we're talking about, they are my kind in blood and bonds, even though in other ways we are very different. I do all that I can for my family. Dad's still not well, so he don't have the energy to work full time, and Mum, she can't work at all any more. Caroline's fired and they can't afford to hire Mikael full time, only 75 percent. Before I knew this, I asked Mum for, let's see, four days off, so that I could recover slightly from the teaching job and spend some time with Nikki before he leaves. Apparently, that makes me a lazy, irresponsible imbecil, according to my sister, who suddenly has to come down from Stockholm to relieve my parents from work. How does that add up? No one even asked me to come to work before they called my sister. Course I would have done it, what else would I do? But obviously, my parents thought it best for me to rest, since I'm the lazy, irresponsible, egoistic daughter, and ask my sister to travel half across the country to fix things up. It just feels like I aint worth shit. No, let's ask Anchi instead, she probably needs a break from the big city life and the hard day's work of not doing shit. Come on, how many times haven't I been there, how many times didn't I do anything that you asked me?
Mum and Dad, you know I love you, but you've got to let me hate you for a while.
poet IN THE jar
Wednesday, July 4
Promises
One day I'm gonna fly away from here
I'm gonna spread my wings and disappear
No duties, have-to-do's
I'll fly away from here
One day I'm gonna take you out of here
I'm gonna lift you up, we'll disappear
No duties, have-to-do's
We'll fly away from here, yeah
We'll fly away from here
I'm gonna keep my promises
Can't see why that should change
Yeah! I'm gonna keep my promises
Can't see why that would change
Well so long and goodnight now
They tell me there's no use
But I know yeah I know now
That aint no good excuse
One day I'm gonna fly away from here
I'm gonna spread my wings and disappear
No duties, have-to-do's
I'll fly away from here
One day I'm gonna take you out of here
I'm gonna lift you up, we'll disappear
No duties, have-to-do's
We'll fly away from here, yeah
We'll fly away from here
Did you think I would accept this?
Just watch and walk away
No! I aint gonna go accepting this
Grieve briefly, walk away
Well so long and goodbye now
They tell me there's no use
But I know yeah I know now
That aint no good excuse
One day I'm gonna fly away from here
I'm gonna spread my wings and disappear
No duties, have-to-do's
I'll fly away from here
One day I'm gonna take you out of here
I'm gonna lift you up, we'll disappear
No duties, have-to-do's
We'll fly away from here, yeah
We'll fly away from here
Because
If I fall
If I follow you
If, if I fall
If I follow you
If, if I fall
If I follow you
If I should fall
Well I would fall with you
One day I'm gonna fly away from here
I'm gonna spread my wings and disappear
No duties, have-to-do's
I'll fly away from here
One day I'm gonna take you out of here
I'm gonna lift you up, we'll disappear
No duties, have-to-do's
We'll fly away from here, yeah
We'll fly away from here
(If, if I fall...)
One day I'm gonna fly away from here
I'm gonna spread my wings and disappear
No duties, have-to-do's
I'll fly away from here
One day I'm gonna take you out of here
I'm gonna lift you up, we'll disappear
No duties, have-to-do's
We'll fly away from here, yeah
We'll fly away from here
(If, if I fall...)
You fell
I follow
You fell
I follow
You fell
I follow
I keep my promises
_______________________________
This song was kinda inspired by Pier Pressure, and hopefully I'll be able to put up how it sounds here soon. I'm pretty happy with it, I worked a lot on the lyrics and the different melodies that are all featured in here. Wouldn't mind if you let me know what you think of it. =)
I'm gonna spread my wings and disappear
No duties, have-to-do's
I'll fly away from here
One day I'm gonna take you out of here
I'm gonna lift you up, we'll disappear
No duties, have-to-do's
We'll fly away from here, yeah
We'll fly away from here
I'm gonna keep my promises
Can't see why that should change
Yeah! I'm gonna keep my promises
Can't see why that would change
Well so long and goodnight now
They tell me there's no use
But I know yeah I know now
That aint no good excuse
One day I'm gonna fly away from here
I'm gonna spread my wings and disappear
No duties, have-to-do's
I'll fly away from here
One day I'm gonna take you out of here
I'm gonna lift you up, we'll disappear
No duties, have-to-do's
We'll fly away from here, yeah
We'll fly away from here
Did you think I would accept this?
Just watch and walk away
No! I aint gonna go accepting this
Grieve briefly, walk away
Well so long and goodbye now
They tell me there's no use
But I know yeah I know now
That aint no good excuse
One day I'm gonna fly away from here
I'm gonna spread my wings and disappear
No duties, have-to-do's
I'll fly away from here
One day I'm gonna take you out of here
I'm gonna lift you up, we'll disappear
No duties, have-to-do's
We'll fly away from here, yeah
We'll fly away from here
Because
If I fall
If I follow you
If, if I fall
If I follow you
If, if I fall
If I follow you
If I should fall
Well I would fall with you
One day I'm gonna fly away from here
I'm gonna spread my wings and disappear
No duties, have-to-do's
I'll fly away from here
One day I'm gonna take you out of here
I'm gonna lift you up, we'll disappear
No duties, have-to-do's
We'll fly away from here, yeah
We'll fly away from here
(If, if I fall...)
One day I'm gonna fly away from here
I'm gonna spread my wings and disappear
No duties, have-to-do's
I'll fly away from here
One day I'm gonna take you out of here
I'm gonna lift you up, we'll disappear
No duties, have-to-do's
We'll fly away from here, yeah
We'll fly away from here
(If, if I fall...)
You fell
I follow
You fell
I follow
You fell
I follow
I keep my promises
_______________________________
This song was kinda inspired by Pier Pressure, and hopefully I'll be able to put up how it sounds here soon. I'm pretty happy with it, I worked a lot on the lyrics and the different melodies that are all featured in here. Wouldn't mind if you let me know what you think of it. =)
Tuesday, July 3
Midsummer's Eve Photos
Right, cheers guys! I got these pics from Jonas, I thought it'd be easiest to erase the ones that were on here already and just redo it, in a better-looking way. As I wrote in the no longer existing entry from Midsummer's Day, the camera went from hand to hand, and yeah well, here are the results. Scroll down, folks. (Descriptions next to the pics.)
Jonas apparently cheers for Sweden!
Right, I imagine it something like this. Danny: "No seriously. If it was you who let the birds out..."
I dunno how I got that hair...?
Haha, this is one of my favourite pics! This is what happens to normal guys when they cram together with karaoke and beer.
Danny & Johnny wailing away (You can't not love this pic.)
Danny & Johan giving out free kisses! Call now!
Singstar itself!
Johnny, Nikki & The Brainless Bunny. Say no more.
The Bunny now seems to be the Friendless Bunny...
Danny & Me posing
What's going on in Pontus's head?
Johan seems to wanna go swimming...
Nikki & Viktor playing "Singstar", Jonas & me warming up in the background, haha.
Before...
...and after. Can't believe I drank those. They had coffee in them!
Jonas, Johnny & Me. Thumbs up!
Yummy!
Emil and Johan are doing some kind of, I dunno, Trying-to-steal your-haircut kind of pose.
Well, that's about it, those were the best and most flattering ones... not counting blurry or somehow inappropriate ones (like a set of pics of me half asleep, half dressed that I soon realised no one had erased). Now that I've done that, I'm gonna check some sites for a new flat. Cheers...
OhOoooHooOOOhooOOHoooOOO from Me - The Little Author Wannabe
Jonas apparently cheers for Sweden!
Right, I imagine it something like this. Danny: "No seriously. If it was you who let the birds out..."
I dunno how I got that hair...?
Haha, this is one of my favourite pics! This is what happens to normal guys when they cram together with karaoke and beer.
Danny & Johnny wailing away (You can't not love this pic.)
Danny & Johan giving out free kisses! Call now!
Singstar itself!
Johnny, Nikki & The Brainless Bunny. Say no more.
The Bunny now seems to be the Friendless Bunny...
Danny & Me posing
What's going on in Pontus's head?
Johan seems to wanna go swimming...
Nikki & Viktor playing "Singstar", Jonas & me warming up in the background, haha.
Before...
...and after. Can't believe I drank those. They had coffee in them!
Jonas, Johnny & Me. Thumbs up!
Yummy!
Emil and Johan are doing some kind of, I dunno, Trying-to-steal your-haircut kind of pose.
Well, that's about it, those were the best and most flattering ones... not counting blurry or somehow inappropriate ones (like a set of pics of me half asleep, half dressed that I soon realised no one had erased). Now that I've done that, I'm gonna check some sites for a new flat. Cheers...
OhOoooHooOOOhooOOHoooOOO from Me - The Little Author Wannabe
Monday, July 2
PIER PRESSURE!
YEAY! Yesterday PIER PRESSURE finally struck us with awe, and it blew the roof off! Well, not literally, there wasn't really that much of a roof to talk about, but if there had been, it most certainly would have blown the roof off. I thought it was great, I mean, I'd pay 500SEK just to see My Chemical Romance, but now I got to see loads of bands, some of which I never woulda discovered otherwise. Check out the Glass Links to your right, I've updated it by now. Well, sure there were things you might wanna comment on - should the guy in the wardrobe really be smoking while he hands out your jackets? Yuck - but the gig schedule - come on! You gotta admit it aint no pile of shit, right?
I'm pretty messed up today, we've barely slept four hours, my feet are still sore from all the mad jumping up and down and walking the streets, and I've done my last day at summer school. So you aint gonna find any clever thoughts in here tonight, sorry, guys. I just thought I'd post some of the pics I took yesterday. Enjoy, fellas!
JULY 3RD EDIT: The title belonging to the pic is the one directly above the picture. Also, Jessi noted that I'd written Sunrise Avenue on four pictures but two of them were actually Sounds of Violence. My mistake, but I've taken care of that. After all, we're all just human, aren't we?
Less Than Jake
Sunrise Avenue
Sounds Like Violence
Me & Jessi
Nikki, Terese & Johanna
Sofia & Linda
Jessi & Me
and...
MY...
CHEMICAL...
ROMANCE...!
Thx for droppin' by!
I'm pretty messed up today, we've barely slept four hours, my feet are still sore from all the mad jumping up and down and walking the streets, and I've done my last day at summer school. So you aint gonna find any clever thoughts in here tonight, sorry, guys. I just thought I'd post some of the pics I took yesterday. Enjoy, fellas!
JULY 3RD EDIT: The title belonging to the pic is the one directly above the picture. Also, Jessi noted that I'd written Sunrise Avenue on four pictures but two of them were actually Sounds of Violence. My mistake, but I've taken care of that. After all, we're all just human, aren't we?
Less Than Jake
Sunrise Avenue
Sounds Like Violence
Me & Jessi
Nikki, Terese & Johanna
Sofia & Linda
Jessi & Me
and...
MY...
CHEMICAL...
ROMANCE...!
Thx for droppin' by!
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