Hio, guys. I've gotten sick. Again. Sleeping away all my time. Don't know whether I'll be able to take my driver's lesson today, but with the test coming up soon, I don't think I have a choice.
Worst part is, with this cold or whatever it is, I dare not do my piercing today as planned, cause of the raised risk for infections. Really sucks.
Better go shower and brush my teeth. And I'll feel at least a little bit better...
Cheers.
Thursday, May 31
Sunday, May 27
Wind-Still, Silent Grounds
A breeze of fresh air, a wind from the east.
Curing my illness, ridding the beast.
Try to reconcile myself, try to sail, just once more.
But the breezes won't be found,
on these wind-still, silent grounds.
______________________________
Curing my illness, ridding the beast.
Try to reconcile myself, try to sail, just once more.
But the breezes won't be found,
on these wind-still, silent grounds.
______________________________
I had a really nice time yesterday. Felt vivid again, felt alive. Nice and fresh, straight from the sea. What could I tell you? It lifted my sails. Apart from the comment, 'Hey, I know you! You're the gas station girl!' it was one of the best evenings in some time. It'll actually be pretty nice going back to work next week. Ha, ha.
See ya soon, when I aint so tired and got something useful to write about.
POET in the bloody JAR
(Case you hadn't got that already)
Sunday, May 20
Figured Out
Please, will you listen,
Will you hear me out?
I think I've figured out
what we both are all about.
Cause now you aint around
I'm nowhere to be found.
I'm so sorry I've enslaved you.
That I've wanted to betray you.
Cause I know now that I crave you,
Not the other way around.
Please, will you come to me,
Will you be my voice and shout?
Cause I think I've figured out
what I can't live or breathe without.
________________________________
Better go to bed now, would be kinda embarassing if Nikki came home from the pub at this hour and I was still up, playing computer games, haha. He's got me completely addicted by this Anarchy Online thing. I don't mind, though. I kinda like going into that other world, being completely absorbed by it and forgetting all about your own problems. Got my Doc, Leniency, a name that means mild and gentle, all the way up to level 11, and even got off Noob Island on the same day. So now I'm running errans in Old Athens. It's a lot of fun :)
You know, I try to tell myself that no one's gonna fill that hole in me, and it has to be true, since I can hardly bear being alone. But I can't bear being with others either.
Something scary happened to me yesterday in the kitchen. But I'm thinking it's too personal, and intimidating, to write about here. Who knows, Mom might even start thinking she's right about the reasons of my poetry.
Bye bye soldier.
Yours,
POET in the JAR
(With Open Jaws)
Will you hear me out?
I think I've figured out
what we both are all about.
Cause now you aint around
I'm nowhere to be found.
I'm so sorry I've enslaved you.
That I've wanted to betray you.
Cause I know now that I crave you,
Not the other way around.
Please, will you come to me,
Will you be my voice and shout?
Cause I think I've figured out
what I can't live or breathe without.
________________________________
Better go to bed now, would be kinda embarassing if Nikki came home from the pub at this hour and I was still up, playing computer games, haha. He's got me completely addicted by this Anarchy Online thing. I don't mind, though. I kinda like going into that other world, being completely absorbed by it and forgetting all about your own problems. Got my Doc, Leniency, a name that means mild and gentle, all the way up to level 11, and even got off Noob Island on the same day. So now I'm running errans in Old Athens. It's a lot of fun :)
You know, I try to tell myself that no one's gonna fill that hole in me, and it has to be true, since I can hardly bear being alone. But I can't bear being with others either.
Something scary happened to me yesterday in the kitchen. But I'm thinking it's too personal, and intimidating, to write about here. Who knows, Mom might even start thinking she's right about the reasons of my poetry.
Bye bye soldier.
Yours,
POET in the JAR
(With Open Jaws)
Saturday, May 19
Simply A Vampire
I still remember,
haven't forgot.
If I was with you,
or if I was not.
I still could remember,
can't help that I would.
You were simply a vampire,
misunderstood.
__________________________
I know it's gone. Flown away. Never to return. But the thoughts of it trace me. Make things glimmer, make things bright. Strange how you can endure every passing day feeding from thoughts of the glowing, shimmering past.
I'm done with looking in from the outside, it's time to start looking out from the inside instead, starting now.
What if I said I don't want no imaginary friends anymore?
I'm the Poet, in the Jar,
Don't come near,
Don't go too far,
Cause I'm the Poet,
With screeching claws,
Myself a monster,
I'll open my jaws.
haven't forgot.
If I was with you,
or if I was not.
I still could remember,
can't help that I would.
You were simply a vampire,
misunderstood.
__________________________
I know it's gone. Flown away. Never to return. But the thoughts of it trace me. Make things glimmer, make things bright. Strange how you can endure every passing day feeding from thoughts of the glowing, shimmering past.
I'm done with looking in from the outside, it's time to start looking out from the inside instead, starting now.
What if I said I don't want no imaginary friends anymore?
I'm the Poet, in the Jar,
Don't come near,
Don't go too far,
Cause I'm the Poet,
With screeching claws,
Myself a monster,
I'll open my jaws.
Wednesday, May 16
Trail of the Comet
Should I chase the fireworks,
hasting away,
just to see how it feels
when I touch them?
Should I follow the fireflies,
chasing the night,
just to see how it feels
when I join them?
I'm thinking I will,
yes, I actually might,
I'm hunting you down, Comet,
starting tonight.
___________________________
Can't wait until tomorrow... Something good is gonna happen, something really good. I can feel it. Like it's making my body tingle and shiver all over. Yeah, can't wait until tomorrow...
I had a strange dream tonight, or should I say this morning. I was on the bus, talking to the man sitting next to me, when suddenly he took out a sharpened pen and started stabbing himself on the inside of his palms. It was so unexpected, just flung right at me from the middle of a dream that to begin with felt so warm and reassuring. I'm so sick of that. Whenever you think things are looking up, something swings down on you, reaching for you, trying to trick your feet and make you stagger, make you fall.
I aint gonna fall, not now, and not for quite a while either. I know what it's all about. You don't have to build yourself a life out of dishes, dirty clothes to wash, dinners to cook, cats to feed, exams to study for, jobs to jump in at when someone gets sick. All that don't matter, it's unimportant. Your real life is who you are. What's in your head and your heart. Your thoughts, your emotions. And what you use them for. That's what's really you. No love will ever fill that hole in your heart. No company will ever make you feel less lonely. All that matters is you, and what you got in there, and what you can do with it.
I'm so tired of shallow people. Surrounding themselves with expensive perfumes and Gucci bags so that they can feel like they actually fit in somewhere, like someone actually cares. But you put your perfume on and walk the streets with your Gucci bag and see if it makes you happy. See if it makes you feel better. Or if it's just your satisfaction over being born better off than others. Born into a world where houses with neat lawns matter more than if an orphan on the other side of the globe will live or die.
No... I'm just sick of it. This. Everything. I'll live my everyday life and sometimes, I'll be happy about it.
But I'll always be different. Because I know.
POET in the JAR
hasting away,
just to see how it feels
when I touch them?
Should I follow the fireflies,
chasing the night,
just to see how it feels
when I join them?
I'm thinking I will,
yes, I actually might,
I'm hunting you down, Comet,
starting tonight.
___________________________
Can't wait until tomorrow... Something good is gonna happen, something really good. I can feel it. Like it's making my body tingle and shiver all over. Yeah, can't wait until tomorrow...
I had a strange dream tonight, or should I say this morning. I was on the bus, talking to the man sitting next to me, when suddenly he took out a sharpened pen and started stabbing himself on the inside of his palms. It was so unexpected, just flung right at me from the middle of a dream that to begin with felt so warm and reassuring. I'm so sick of that. Whenever you think things are looking up, something swings down on you, reaching for you, trying to trick your feet and make you stagger, make you fall.
I aint gonna fall, not now, and not for quite a while either. I know what it's all about. You don't have to build yourself a life out of dishes, dirty clothes to wash, dinners to cook, cats to feed, exams to study for, jobs to jump in at when someone gets sick. All that don't matter, it's unimportant. Your real life is who you are. What's in your head and your heart. Your thoughts, your emotions. And what you use them for. That's what's really you. No love will ever fill that hole in your heart. No company will ever make you feel less lonely. All that matters is you, and what you got in there, and what you can do with it.
I'm so tired of shallow people. Surrounding themselves with expensive perfumes and Gucci bags so that they can feel like they actually fit in somewhere, like someone actually cares. But you put your perfume on and walk the streets with your Gucci bag and see if it makes you happy. See if it makes you feel better. Or if it's just your satisfaction over being born better off than others. Born into a world where houses with neat lawns matter more than if an orphan on the other side of the globe will live or die.
No... I'm just sick of it. This. Everything. I'll live my everyday life and sometimes, I'll be happy about it.
But I'll always be different. Because I know.
POET in the JAR
Sunday, May 13
Silly Me, Silly Trick
Firefly, oh, Firefly. As beautiful as the fallen sky. As always I'm breathless.
We went out to celebrate Jessi's 20th birthday yesterday. It was the summer premiere of Trägår'n, and you wouldn't believe me if I told you how many people were there. It took us 50 minutes standing in line just to get in, and another 20 minutes to get in the ladies' room. I hate those kind of lines. If you weren't sober when you got there, you soon became sober of all the heat, the mass of people, lack of oxygen, and drunk, unpleasant people dropping their stinking cigarettes on your jacket.
Half the time I had so much fun, the other half I was drunk and absent. When I fell asleep in the couch with Jessi and Danne, one of the guards came along and asked me, "How are you feeling?", looking at me suspiciously. And I gave him the most beaming smile I could forge, and said, "Oh, I'm just a little sleepy, that's all." "Okay," said the guard and headed off. I can't believe they didn't throw me out, which they probably would have, if I wasn't a girl.
I think I got tricked at one point, when I went over to the DJ boot to request a song. There were two guys standing there, the DJ and someone he seemed to be talking to. So I asked the guy next to the DJ, "Can you request songs tonight?" He looked at me with a smile and said, "Of course you can! ...If you give me a kiss on the cheek!" And stupid as I was, I did so, and then requested my song. When I checked back later, he was mysteriously gone, and the DJ had no idea what song I had requested. Silly me. Silly trick!
Haha!
The only thing bad about yesterday I guess, is that the birthday child wasn't half as drunk as I was! Shame on me... Should have bought her more drinks!
Poet in the Jar
We went out to celebrate Jessi's 20th birthday yesterday. It was the summer premiere of Trägår'n, and you wouldn't believe me if I told you how many people were there. It took us 50 minutes standing in line just to get in, and another 20 minutes to get in the ladies' room. I hate those kind of lines. If you weren't sober when you got there, you soon became sober of all the heat, the mass of people, lack of oxygen, and drunk, unpleasant people dropping their stinking cigarettes on your jacket.
Half the time I had so much fun, the other half I was drunk and absent. When I fell asleep in the couch with Jessi and Danne, one of the guards came along and asked me, "How are you feeling?", looking at me suspiciously. And I gave him the most beaming smile I could forge, and said, "Oh, I'm just a little sleepy, that's all." "Okay," said the guard and headed off. I can't believe they didn't throw me out, which they probably would have, if I wasn't a girl.
I think I got tricked at one point, when I went over to the DJ boot to request a song. There were two guys standing there, the DJ and someone he seemed to be talking to. So I asked the guy next to the DJ, "Can you request songs tonight?" He looked at me with a smile and said, "Of course you can! ...If you give me a kiss on the cheek!" And stupid as I was, I did so, and then requested my song. When I checked back later, he was mysteriously gone, and the DJ had no idea what song I had requested. Silly me. Silly trick!
Haha!
The only thing bad about yesterday I guess, is that the birthday child wasn't half as drunk as I was! Shame on me... Should have bought her more drinks!
Poet in the Jar
Friday, May 11
The Darkness I Pace
Don't cast your light on me
It would be a waste of time
I'll still be pacing the darkness,
Under star-less, gloomy skies.
Don't try to lay those eyes on me
I'd only look down and turn away
Cause I know I don't deserve your love
Or at least not in that way.
So don't you try to enlighten me
It's only a matter of time
Before the darkness I pace races my mind
And I'm engulfed, swallowed up inside,
I can finally rest,
under gloomy skies.
_________________________________
The Poet's back. Back in action. Back in attack. The Poet's sick of having the Glass walls hinder her in every move she tries to make. Having the Glass blocking her every thought. Her every feeling. She read somewhere that some people enjoy being all miserable, you know, damaged, difficult and misunderstood. Whoever wrote that had obviously never been miserable.
But there's light in there. Somewhere in the tunnel. A light that hopefully doesn't come from a speeding train...
POET in the JAR
It would be a waste of time
I'll still be pacing the darkness,
Under star-less, gloomy skies.
Don't try to lay those eyes on me
I'd only look down and turn away
Cause I know I don't deserve your love
Or at least not in that way.
So don't you try to enlighten me
It's only a matter of time
Before the darkness I pace races my mind
And I'm engulfed, swallowed up inside,
I can finally rest,
under gloomy skies.
_________________________________
The Poet's back. Back in action. Back in attack. The Poet's sick of having the Glass walls hinder her in every move she tries to make. Having the Glass blocking her every thought. Her every feeling. She read somewhere that some people enjoy being all miserable, you know, damaged, difficult and misunderstood. Whoever wrote that had obviously never been miserable.
But there's light in there. Somewhere in the tunnel. A light that hopefully doesn't come from a speeding train...
POET in the JAR
Thursday, May 10
Stupidity, Stubborness and Denial
Something is very wrong with this world. Or should I say the people in it? I am almost lacking words to describe the incredible stupidity, stubborness, and denial, that some people possess. What happened to the golden rule, to common sense, to doing good? Suddenly I find myself naive for ever having thought that those things were even current on this planet. People who live in frustration take it out on someone else, anyone who's weaker than them, so they can feel powerful for once in their life, so they can feel the rush of complete dominance over an innocent soul. When you cross the line, you break her whole being, she'll live the rest of her life with constant glances over her shoulder and constantly denying chances to be loved, afraid that what you did to her will happen again. But hey, it's a win-win situation, innit? You get to feel powerful, first during the act of ill will, greed and desire, and secondly when the court frees you and you leave the inquiry room as a free man, able to do it again, and again, and a hundred times more, to a hundred other girls, cause you can be sure that they'll free you every time. And she gets to be taken by a man. Surely that's what every girl wants, right? Who's gonna believe a 19 year old girl if she claims the opposite? Imagine this. A man is walking down the street, adjusting his watch, when it is snatched out of his hand by a pick-pocket. Then imagine this. The thief is being charged, and his defence asks the man with the watch the same kind of questions they would ask the victim of a brutal rape. Were you flashing the watch in the open? Were you drunk when it happened? The defendant never heard you say no to having your watch stolen. Besides, is it true that you've been giving away watches in the past? That concludes it. You can only blame yourself for being robbed in that situation. Hear how ridiculous that sounds? Well, listen to this: Were you flashing your skin? Were you drunk when it happened? The defendant never heard you saying no to having sex. Besides, is it true that you've been having a lot of sex in the past? That concludes it. You can only blame yourself for being raped in that situation.
It's a shame for us all that this is the reality for rape victims in this country. Women don't have a say in the matter. Suit yourself if he mollested you, you were standing there in a mini-skirt, so what did you expect? Strange how no one tells the man with the watch that if he hadn't worn that Rolex, it wouldn't have happened. Geee, salvate us, someone.
POET in the JAR
It's a shame for us all that this is the reality for rape victims in this country. Women don't have a say in the matter. Suit yourself if he mollested you, you were standing there in a mini-skirt, so what did you expect? Strange how no one tells the man with the watch that if he hadn't worn that Rolex, it wouldn't have happened. Geee, salvate us, someone.
POET in the JAR
Wednesday, May 9
Toolbox
You coming?
Wanna fix me?
Whip your toolbox out
and hit me?
Are you coming?
Coming with me?
So you can drink me,
so you can eat me,
do me and mistreat me?
I know you were never
the best I could find,
and I've done what I could
to rid you from mind,
But I'll still let you fix me
You're the only one who could
And my conscious lets me ask you
Cause I know you never would.
_______________________________
Meredith Grey. Said. Something. That. Affected. Me. She said that choosing between the man who was best for you, and the man who was the one, she would have to choose the one.
I chose the guy who would be best for me. My Pearl. Wouldn't ever hurt me. I am not even close to deserving his love for me. I should be happy, but I'm not, and everything leaks out here, I don't know how much longer I'll stand it.
Wanna fix me?
Whip your toolbox out
and hit me?
Are you coming?
Coming with me?
So you can drink me,
so you can eat me,
do me and mistreat me?
I know you were never
the best I could find,
and I've done what I could
to rid you from mind,
But I'll still let you fix me
You're the only one who could
And my conscious lets me ask you
Cause I know you never would.
_______________________________
Meredith Grey. Said. Something. That. Affected. Me. She said that choosing between the man who was best for you, and the man who was the one, she would have to choose the one.
I chose the guy who would be best for me. My Pearl. Wouldn't ever hurt me. I am not even close to deserving his love for me. I should be happy, but I'm not, and everything leaks out here, I don't know how much longer I'll stand it.
Tuesday, May 8
Start From Scratch
Give me faith
Give me strength
To this life,
That I rent
Those are the only words I have the energy to put here right now. Things are so messed up. I failed the Phonetics exam, knew I would, but seeing it on paper made it feel much worse. It doesn't bother me that I didn't pass, you know, it's not that, the problem is that I sure got enough of things to worry about, without having to study Phonetics again, from scratch. Besides, this means I have to reschedule my driver's license test, which sucks. Aaah, I dunno, don't even wanna complain to myself. Yeah... I'm gonna fix things up and it'll all be allright... I'm just longing back to when things weren't half as complicated and sure wasn't half as boring.
I saw the Firefly yesterday. On the bus. Heading home from work. I hid away in the seats in the far back and managed to get out of sight. I wasn't exactly looking astonishing, if I may say so, and that's the only way I want him to see me. Fireworks, baby, fireworks.
Nightie... Oooops... I mean, good morning... yaaaaaawn... Got a loooong day ahead of me... I'm gonna get started.
PS: You can't say I don't look awesome in my new piercing though... haha DS.
Give me strength
To this life,
That I rent
Those are the only words I have the energy to put here right now. Things are so messed up. I failed the Phonetics exam, knew I would, but seeing it on paper made it feel much worse. It doesn't bother me that I didn't pass, you know, it's not that, the problem is that I sure got enough of things to worry about, without having to study Phonetics again, from scratch. Besides, this means I have to reschedule my driver's license test, which sucks. Aaah, I dunno, don't even wanna complain to myself. Yeah... I'm gonna fix things up and it'll all be allright... I'm just longing back to when things weren't half as complicated and sure wasn't half as boring.
I saw the Firefly yesterday. On the bus. Heading home from work. I hid away in the seats in the far back and managed to get out of sight. I wasn't exactly looking astonishing, if I may say so, and that's the only way I want him to see me. Fireworks, baby, fireworks.
Nightie... Oooops... I mean, good morning... yaaaaaawn... Got a loooong day ahead of me... I'm gonna get started.
PS: You can't say I don't look awesome in my new piercing though... haha DS.
Friday, May 4
Piercings, Tattoos, and Miscellaneous Pain
Didn't know I could feel like this
Like I've never seen the sky
Before
- Ewan McGregor, Moulin Rouge
Soon as my sister shows up, we're headed for Viking Studios, and I'm having my first piercing! I'm gonna put it in my eyebrow, I think it'll look nice. Nikki didn't like the idea... but you can't always please everyone, can you? Besides, there's a little punk-rocker in him that would love to have his girlfriend pierce her eyebrow and colour her hair black. I kinda miss my black hair! Gonna ask my sister to help me fix it back, hehe. She's having her second tattoo today, her boyfriend's name with an Omega symbol instead of the O, across the side of her foot. Ouch, that gotta hurt. Just when I'm starting to really consider a moth tattoo in my neck, I'm coming with her to watch how it's actually done, and I'm pretty sure I'll be as terrified as last time she did it. You just don't see all that blood when you're watching Miami Ink, you know?
If this piercing works out allright, I might just do another one in my lip. Don't know what's up with me, but I gotta do something, gotta keep those thoughts away.
Read about a guy today who ran into a car door with his bicycle, smashed his head against the concrete and died on spot. This world is so unfair! Well, I guess it aint worse than the boy who died when he was jumping on his bed and the window next to it was open...
"Gimme faith, gimme strength, to this life, that I rent"
Poet in the Jar
Like I've never seen the sky
Before
- Ewan McGregor, Moulin Rouge
Soon as my sister shows up, we're headed for Viking Studios, and I'm having my first piercing! I'm gonna put it in my eyebrow, I think it'll look nice. Nikki didn't like the idea... but you can't always please everyone, can you? Besides, there's a little punk-rocker in him that would love to have his girlfriend pierce her eyebrow and colour her hair black. I kinda miss my black hair! Gonna ask my sister to help me fix it back, hehe. She's having her second tattoo today, her boyfriend's name with an Omega symbol instead of the O, across the side of her foot. Ouch, that gotta hurt. Just when I'm starting to really consider a moth tattoo in my neck, I'm coming with her to watch how it's actually done, and I'm pretty sure I'll be as terrified as last time she did it. You just don't see all that blood when you're watching Miami Ink, you know?
If this piercing works out allright, I might just do another one in my lip. Don't know what's up with me, but I gotta do something, gotta keep those thoughts away.
Read about a guy today who ran into a car door with his bicycle, smashed his head against the concrete and died on spot. This world is so unfair! Well, I guess it aint worse than the boy who died when he was jumping on his bed and the window next to it was open...
"Gimme faith, gimme strength, to this life, that I rent"
Poet in the Jar
Wednesday, May 2
A Moth Reborn
"What kinds of people are there, Daddy?"
"There are all kinds. Even those you wouldn't think exist, exist."
- Me and my father in discussion
Some won't change. Some always change. Some have been the same all along, but you don't see it until you change yourself. You rearrange your life and the decorations in it. Ooops, there goes an old vase I used to like but suddenly find ugly, and wow, are these curtains new? I've never looked at them like this before. What I'm trying to say is that your eyes change, but not necessarily what's around you. I wish I could just press the contents of my life into a mixer and watch it whirl around, events replacing eachother, relations ending and starting at new points in time, appropriate points, cause what comes out is a perfectly blended, fresh-tasting smoothie. I wanna grab events from my past and put them in my present, and banish events from the present to the past. I wanna mess up my life, wanna screw it up so bad that God, if he exists, would have no choice but let me start over to make it right. And if that can't happen, I wanna leave this place and never come back, I could start over somewhere else. Another place would be my home, other faces would be my friends, I wouldn't be caught, I'd be free, and I would enjoy solistice for the first time in years. Out of imprisonment, out of your blue shadows, out of misery. Free as a bird, a moth reborn, I would fly... Fly and never land.
___________________________
"There are all kinds. Even those you wouldn't think exist, exist."
- Me and my father in discussion
Some won't change. Some always change. Some have been the same all along, but you don't see it until you change yourself. You rearrange your life and the decorations in it. Ooops, there goes an old vase I used to like but suddenly find ugly, and wow, are these curtains new? I've never looked at them like this before. What I'm trying to say is that your eyes change, but not necessarily what's around you. I wish I could just press the contents of my life into a mixer and watch it whirl around, events replacing eachother, relations ending and starting at new points in time, appropriate points, cause what comes out is a perfectly blended, fresh-tasting smoothie. I wanna grab events from my past and put them in my present, and banish events from the present to the past. I wanna mess up my life, wanna screw it up so bad that God, if he exists, would have no choice but let me start over to make it right. And if that can't happen, I wanna leave this place and never come back, I could start over somewhere else. Another place would be my home, other faces would be my friends, I wouldn't be caught, I'd be free, and I would enjoy solistice for the first time in years. Out of imprisonment, out of your blue shadows, out of misery. Free as a bird, a moth reborn, I would fly... Fly and never land.
___________________________
Tuesday, May 1
A Moth With Ashes For Wings
Cheers to us laughers, drowning our sorrows in drinks. That's Fanny to the far left, my best friend Jessie in the middle, and myself at the far right. Pic from yesterday, when I managed to break yet another necklace, drop my bracelet in the beer, have my foot stepped on no less than eight times, meet and regret my Firefly, and once again fall in love with my now black-haired, beautiful, wonderful Pearl._______________________________
Funny I should write that yesterday... funny it should come to my mind. Later that night I caught sight of my Firefly. And a train of thoughts and emotions started pacing and racing through me, a chain of memories and glimpses from the past bursting into me, like a flood, a river, a jumbojet. The defences must hold. They will hold. They will not hold. I can still feel the fluttering of your wings upon my skin... I can see your shimmer, your fire, your light... I'm thrown back in time, to the first time, the innocent time... before you left me. There is no sense in this... none at all... There's no use in repeating your past, you'll only lose what you could have in the present. But still... it's a nice daydream. Trying not to think of how helpless a moth like me is when a Firefly like you has burnt my wings into ashes. Forever damaged, forever traumatized, you left only a shell of me behind for others to try and fill but always to fail. Cause even if our fire was short and intense, together, Firefly, we were fucking fireworks while we were on fire. And no steady glow could replace that...
Or could it?
- Poet in the Jar
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