Overwhelming Distances And A Lot Of Miles

Back from the big city, and very much glad to be. It's like, among all those people, you just disappear, you vanish. You know that if you went missing that very second no one would know, or care, cause you're invisible. You don't know anyone and everyone around you are always on the move to go someplace else. Never just enjoying the moment.
I don't know why exactly, but I felt kinda uneasy during my whole stay. It's as if the very core of my being just knows I don't belong there, and wants to repel me from being there, sort of. In one way it was good, though, I got out of this place for a while. And I didn't really miss it all that much. The overwhelming distance simply didn't feel overwhelming. Does that mean, A, either I've gotten a bit used to it, or B, that I've grown a bit stronger in myself and don't need to be at home, or around my friends, every second in order to feel safe? Feel secure?
I don't know. But as good as it might have been to go away, it was ten times as good to come back again. I've missed this town. I love it.
And a part of me gotta admit that it aint the funniest part of my life to hop along after my sis and her various boyfriends. (Well, she's been in a long relationship for a while, but now she's out and about again.) And there was something about this one that I didn't really seem to like. He was too, how do I say it, smarty? He really seemed to think he knew everything, and still he was real quick to use certain discriminating words about things or people he didn't like (words that I kinda sucked in that really got to me when I know they shouldn't). Maybe he should have thought of that before he opened his mouth. But they never do. It's not like I'm a genious but I'm at least trying to be a bit humble against people. You don't just blurt out certain words and expressions, who knows, there might be someone around you taking it offensively? I know I wouldn't wanna be called certain things, why should I call other people those things then?
Well, it might just be me, but that kind of behaviour of his, proves him more ignorant than clever in my eyes.
Not in my sis' eyes, though, she seems to think he's Mr. MacHeaven.
But I guess that's nothing but fair. She and Ruby never got along, now it's my turn to not get along with MacHeaven.
And I did try.
I really did.
I just don't have the energy to do it anymore.
And I'm sick of being the third wheel.
Cheers...